all the stupid shit I’ve been through with you & you’re the one thats going to throw it all away? you probably just used me for sex & since you got what you wanted, it’s all over. then to fin out that you possibly cheated on me? HELL FUCKING NO!

now we’re so far along, so close to you coming home from deployment training & everything going back to normal, so close to our wedding date. you think I can’t handle your deployment, maybe your right but I’ve always been a committed fiancé. we fight alot & we dont agree on much but you are my life & you’re throwing everything away. you told me you would never leave, you said you cant be with me anymore. I don’t know what to think, my heart is shattered. I took you for granted because I knew you would come back to me, but now your done with the bullshit;

atleast my lava lamp is using protection

of course, all relationships have their fair share of arguments. Blake & I, on the other hand, argue like an old married couple. at times, it’s difficult because we both have a temper, but it’s only because we love & care about one another. I wouldn’t change or trade him for anything in the world! he’s my hubby & my future everything!

if your kid is tired & you’re trying to shop, just throw them in the buggy basket

I look back at all my older posts, & they’re all mostly negative & all mostly about Blake! our relationship is literally like a roller coaster at times, up & down, up & down, over & over & over again! but of course, things ways end up good in the end. things always get worst before they get better. so at the moment, our relationship is going absolutely fantastic & I hope it stays this way!! I love Blake with all my heart & soul, he’s my lover & he completes me.

what a waste of my high school years. ill never forget the memories we created, but do you regret them now? there will, no doubt, always be a part of my heart that will forever belong to you. I know you’ll be hard to get over, but maybe this is for the better. I’ll pray for your safety & happiness with the career choice you’ve chosen. my thoughts will always be focused on you, until we meet again;

I think I’ve decided to not talk to you for at least 24 hours. who knows when you’ll be in town this weekend? you piss me off way too much for an average person to handle. I love you & everything but I’m just tired of the bullshit. maybe I’m not ready to be in this relationship with you…

things I miss: I miss touching your face. i miss holding you tight when I hug you. I miss when we wrestle like little kids. I miss when we argue like an old married couple. I miss holding your hand in school. I miss writing you love notes. I miss waking up to text messages from you. I miss kissing your lips. I miss when you bite my cheeks. I miss when you suck on my bottom lip. I miss your smell. I miss your eyes. I miss hearing you say my name. I miss your big bubble butt. I miss the way you look at me. I miss you when your gone & I miss you when your here. but what I miss the most is you;

maybe it’s better this way. even though the hole in my chest begs for your love. sometimes what you want, isn’t always what you need. but do I need you or want you? maybe it’s been over for us, but we refuse to see the truth. we keep pretending, but I can’t play this game forever;